It is Christmas Eve morning, and I am lucky enough to be sitting beneath a cozy blanket, looking up at a sparkling tree. I can see out my windows on to the cold roofs of the houses nearby and the tops of all the trees, some of which are completely bare now that they have finally given up their fall glory. I have a todo list that will likely get paired down later today, and I even have some bread rising now that I will roll, proof and streusel later. But for right now, sipping my coffee, all is calm, and all is bright, and the world feels magical indeed.

As an adult, I know all too well that the Christmas season can deplete us, and we spend so much of our time trying to recapture the magic that held us in awe as kids. I have tried to put my finger on the difference, in order to recapture some of it, and it is easy to point to big things–Santa, the financial costs, and expectations (from others and ourselves), or just the grown up-ness that makes us realize there are way more important things than whether or not you have a cabbage patch doll under the tree on Christmas morning. (Side story, when I was a very young girl in the 80s, at the height of Cabbage Patch fever, my mom had a doll made for me one year and our neighbor purchased me a cabbage patch kid. Guess which one I played with? Sorry, mom. Your doll was lovely and kind.).

Sitting here this morning makes me realize part of that magic may just be presence, as in my actual presence in the moment, not playing holiday todo list chess, where I am 10 moves ahead of where I am now. Being present right now and letting the kitchen be a mess or perhaps even things that stay undone. There are always things undone, but a time to sit, and think, and enjoy whatever task is currently at hand and to capture some of that childhood magic? I don’t think that should ever go undone. Kid me looked forward to things, but I was present in the moment, even when it was not terribly exciting.

I will eventually finish my cup(s) of coffee, rise from my nested position on the couch and get on with the rest of the things that I need to do today. However, I am making a Christmas Eve resolution to try to be fully present the rest of the day and stop allowing myself to scheme and plan all the joy out of the rest of the day. I don’t want a holiday finish line, I want a holiday experience.

So in case you needed a little extra permission this morning to do things a little differently, please know that your neighbor will love those spiced holiday nuts, or a loaf of eggnog streusel bread, or crazy socks every bit as much on December 27th, as they did on December 24th. In fact, maybe even more so if you enjoyed making them. At least that is what I am betting on in my neighborhood–I will let you know how it goes. Who knows, maybe we will start a revolution with giving friends and family the gift of time to enjoy the full season, without a deadline looming. For now, I am going to expand this feeling of being present all day long, even when it includes a last-minute trip to the grocery store.